


Not Just a Hat

by xxDustNight88



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Crossover, Gen, Magic, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-13 04:08:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29520651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxDustNight88/pseuds/xxDustNight88
Summary: A strange man is brought into the Ministry for questioning. Can Hermione help him with his mysterious hat?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25
Collections: Cast the Dice 2020, Hermione's Haven Bingo 2021, Tropes and Fandoms 2021





	Not Just a Hat

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly never thought I would write this fandom, but here we are branching out once again! Happy reading! xxDustNight
> 
> Huge thank you to GaeilgeRua for allowing me the use of her Grammarly subscription to read this over. Any other mistakes are definitely my own.
> 
> Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury, and Warner Bros. The Walt Disney Company, commonly referred to as Disney, is the parent company of ABC, the network that produces Once Upon a Time and Once Upon a Time in Wonderland. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Prompt: #TropesAndFandoms21 February 10th: Fairytale  
> #CastTheDice20 08/8/20 - Eights: Fairytale  
> #HHBingo21 Square N3: Author's Choice

"It's a bit of a weird case," Harry told Hermione, rubbing at the back of his head.

"Weirder than usual?" Hermione said, biting back a grin. She and Harry had worked together for a few years now. He was an Auror, and she was second in command for Department of Magical Law Enforcement. They ended up working the same cases more often than not, and this time was no exception.

"We brought a man in who isn't a wizard, but he shows traces of magic," Harry explained, handing over the case file. "Claims he needs magic to get back home."

"Where's home?" Hermione asked, flipping open the folder. She briefly glanced at the man's picture before Harry's reply stole all rational thought from her brain.

"Wonderland."

Nearly choking at her surprise, Hermione gave her friend an incredulous stare. "Wonderland? Come on now, Harry. You have to be joking. _He_ has to be joking."

"I wish I was joking," Harry said with a sigh. "He's serious, though. That's why I came to you. Maybe you can talk to him and make sense of it all. If he doesn't start making sense, we'll have to send him down to St. Mungo's, and we both know we don't want that to happen."

Hermione stood there, staring at the file and then nodded. "Alright, let me talk to him. Maybe he'll open up about who he really is and where he came from."

* * *

"Hi there," Hermione greeted, sitting down at the metal table in the interrogation room. Across from her was a man who looked as normal as anyone, at least by wizard standards. He was playing with a hat, and Hermione had to bite back a grin. _The Mad Hatter_. She almost wanted to ask if he wanted some tea… Pulling herself together, she held out her hand. "I'm Granger. Hermione Granger, and I've been given your case. Care to tell me your name?"

"I'm Jefferson," the man grunted, glaring at her from across the table. "I see they sent in reinforcements, but just so you know, I'm not changing my story."

"Your story?" Hermione asked, placing the file folder carefully on the table and carding her fingers together overtop of it. "Care to tell me what that is?"

"You've read the file by now," Jefferson retorted. "Why don't you tell me?"

Raising an eyebrow at his challenge, Hermione decided why not. "Your name is Jefferson, and you claim to be from Wonderland. You were found roaming Diagon Alley, begging anyone who would listen to try and fix your hat. Is that the hat in question?" She pointed at his lap where said hat now rested.

"Yeah," Jefferson said, holding it aloft. "It's meant to be magical, but right now… It's nothing but a hat." Here he tossed the hat into the middle of the table so Hermione could see if more closely.

Getting her wand out of her robes, Hermione poked the worn hat while biting her lower lip. "Seems pretty normal to me," she said and then smiled up at Jefferson. "What is it supposed to do?" She knew the stories, but she needed to hear him say it aloud.

Jefferson rolled his eyes and reached for his hat. Staring inside, he narrowed his eyes and said, "It's supposed to transport me between worlds, but most importantly; it is meant to return me to Wonderland. Once I got here, though, it stopped working. I need help getting back."

Suddenly he was staring at Hermione, the hat momentarily forgotten as he took in her shocked face. "Go on and say it," he challenged, leaning back in his chair with a twisted grin as he twirled the hat in both hands. "You know you want to."

Eying him warily, Hermione slowly said, "Say what?"

"That I'm crazy," Jefferson said, and snapped forward, his chair clanking hard against the cement floor. "It's okay. I hear it a lot. All the best people are crazy, or so I like to tell myself."

Hermione flinched, a sign she was sure he did not miss. "I don't think you're crazy, Jefferson. I just think you're confused. As far as I am aware, Wonderland isn't a real place, so I'm not quite sure how you expect us to get you back there." She quickly scanned her notes and the folder. "If anything, you're looking at being placed in St. Mungo's until we can get to the bottom of your case."

Jefferson seemed to shut down at this news, his eyes growing dark. Slamming a fist down on the metal table, he hissed, "I'm not going to the crazy house, Ms. Granger. I just need you to use your wand to fix my hat. You have magic. My hat does not, but it _needs_ it."

Hermione's mind raced at that. The hat needed magic? What spell would fix a hat? It suddenly dawned on her, and she almost shifted her gaze to the two-way glass behind her. "It's a portkey," she whispered, holding out her hand for the hat.

Scrunching up his face, Jefferson held tighter to his hat. "I have no idea what in the Queen of Hearts you are talking about. It's a simple magical hat. Tap it with your wand, and it will work. I promise." He set it down back in the middle of the table and waved his hand for Hermione to give it a go.

This time, she glanced over her shoulder before tentatively using the tip of her wand to poke the torn brim. Nothing happened, and Hermione let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "Nothing appears to have changed."

Jefferson picked the hat up and put it atop his head. When nothing happened, he grew angry, and threw it back at Hermione so quickly she nearly dropped her wand. "Try _harder_."

Slightly unnerved, Hermione tried several other spells, all of which had no effect upon the hat. After ten minutes, she grew frustrated and placed a hand on the hat. That was when it hit her. "Oh! I think it has a protection spell placed on it!" Excitedly, she met Jefferson's eyes and tapped the wand once more. " _Finite Incantatem_."

The hat appeared to shimmer and then sat still between them. Jefferson hesitantly reached out and picked up the hat, a smile already forming on his face. Grinning wickedly, he titled it up into the air before catching it again. "Ms. Granger, I believe you've done it!" He exclaimed, unable to contain his joy. "I can't thank you enough!"

Then, before Hermione could utter a single word in reply, Jefferson jumped to his feet, placed the hat on his head, and promptly overturned the table. Hermione was thrown to the floor as the table knocked over her chair. In the midst of it all, she lost sight of Jefferson, but thankfully Harry was already on his way through the interrogation room door.

By the time she'd managed to get to her feet, Harry had burst through the door to help. Shoving him aside, Hermione scrambled to her feet and glanced over the top of the fallen table. Gasping, she was surprised to find nobody there. The only thing that remained of Jefferson was his worn-out hat.

"It must have been a portkey," Harry trailed off, bending over and poking it with his wand. "Looks like it's inactive again now."

Picking up the hat, Hermione turned it over and over in her hands before brushing the dust from the brim. "Yeah…" She trailed off, lost in thought. "A portkey. That must be it. I'm still going to put this away for safekeeping," she told her friend.

"Yeah, probably not a bad idea," Harry said as he righted the table and chairs. "Anyway, I have to get back to work. You okay to lock away that file and hat?"

Hermione nodded, still a bit in shock over the entire ordeal. Once Harry had gone, Hermione made her way back to her office where she put the file in the solved cabinet, but for some reason, she couldn't bring herself to take the hat down to the Department of Mysteries. Something told her that this wasn't the last time she'd see Jefferson and that maybe, just maybe, the hat was more than a portkey.

Feeling daring, she tucked the hat into her bag before returning to work. If anyone asked, she'd just tell them that the hat must have gone missing.

**Author's Note:**

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